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Hello once again and I really don't know my state of being at the moment. lol! Can you believe that it's already December? :o
So many changes happened after my last post and where do I begin, really?
Life has been full of colors, maybe it's the ones I adore or I dislike. As days go by, I try to process these feelings slowly but somehow I cannot keep up.
On work
New Adventure
Updated look
To end today's post, here's a poem I found yesterday.
If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy,
don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty
of lives and whole towns destroyed or about
to be. We are not wise, and not very often
kind. And much can never be redeemed.
Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this
is its way of fighting back, that sometimes
something happens better than all the riches
or power in the world. It could be anything,
but very likely you notice it in the instant
when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the case.
Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid
of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.
\\ Always bask in the joy of little things. take care now!
So many changes happened after my last post and where do I begin, really?
Life has been full of colors, maybe it's the ones I adore or I dislike. As days go by, I try to process these feelings slowly but somehow I cannot keep up.
On work
My feelings about work has worsened, the environment is just so toxic lately and I cannot be in this mindset every time I go there. It's so mentally exhausting to mask all these ill feelings because one, I don't half ass my work but the circumstances pushes me to do so. I just want out. I have been working since then but it's the first time I really dislike going. I find no meaning in going, and I just stress myself out to find that meaning. I just want to rewire my brain to just disconnect myself from work and keep afloat until I save up so I can quit ;p
However, quitting for me is such a hard thing to do because I don't believe in quitting -- it's cause I always have to see through everything I once started despite the challenges. I don't know where this stemmed from but maybe it's just me and my Capricorn energy kicking in haha! I must divert this energy to my new adventure!
New Adventure
This year's theme might be change since I have encountered many evident ones this year! I also don't know how to feel about change, half of my heart is happy with any change because yay something new but half of me don't want to fck with any change since the outcome can be unpredictable. But with this new adventure I'll accept, I just have to be really really persistent and brace myself for impact.
I want to further improve my QOL as this is the last month of 2024 and want to discipline myself to keep up with it until next year. Squeezing in exercise everyday and not forget to eat well might be the first in my priority because maaan I gained so much from stress eating ;[
Before the year ends as well, I'll take my PTE! I hope I can pass it knowing I have the most basic english skill lately lol. This is what I get from not reading (visual novels included!!) much and not journaling often. I really blame my work for this. haha :[ I hope I can document my new adventure journey here hehe! please Eureka, hold on to these promises to yourself.
I want to further improve my QOL as this is the last month of 2024 and want to discipline myself to keep up with it until next year. Squeezing in exercise everyday and not forget to eat well might be the first in my priority because maaan I gained so much from stress eating ;[
Before the year ends as well, I'll take my PTE! I hope I can pass it knowing I have the most basic english skill lately lol. This is what I get from not reading (visual novels included!!) much and not journaling often. I really blame my work for this. haha :[ I hope I can document my new adventure journey here hehe! please Eureka, hold on to these promises to yourself.
Updated look
I updated my blog colors too! It's more vibrant so I hope there will be more updates in the future if I feel like it. Color palette here! My last day of vacation ends today so I'm kinda happy I was able to post some updates to unload my brain of thoughts lol
To end today's post, here's a poem I found yesterday.
Don’t Hesitate by Mary Oliver
don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty
of lives and whole towns destroyed or about
to be. We are not wise, and not very often
kind. And much can never be redeemed.
Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this
is its way of fighting back, that sometimes
something happens better than all the riches
or power in the world. It could be anything,
but very likely you notice it in the instant
when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the case.
Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid
of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.
\\ Always bask in the joy of little things. take care now!
